Where've You Been?

Yes, where have I been? It's been almost a year since I last posted. What's up with that? There's not too much that has been going on. Pretty much the same ol' thing. I did make it out to California last October and had a great time with friends and family. Spent 3 days at Disneyland/CA Adventure with the girls, sister and niece. We had so much fun. It was nice to be together to celebrate mine and Ruthie's birthdays. Those two left for Portland and the rest of us drove up to the Central Coast. Spent time with friends there. Didn't get to see some I'd hoped to see but still enjoyed our visit. Spent a lot of time on the beach which was amazing. I do miss the ocean, sand, gulls, the Rock. I'd definitely move back. Thanksgiving and Christmas was nice, quiet, but nice. Then we had a colder winter than usual. We had snow 3-4 times. One week of ice all over. Dangerous driving for sure. Well, I guess I should say dangerous walking also. When trying to entertain lively boys you just can't stay inside. We ventured out for some sledding (not me of course). However, I might have been safer on the sled. That week I fell 3 times, once on my cheek and broke my glasses. They're still broken. I had cataract surgery again, this time on the left eye. It went well. That's why I haven't gotten any new glasses. I'm waiting to see if I need a new prescription. I should know by the end of the month. While someone I know is hiking across Spain, and my sister is soaking up the sun on the beach of Hawaii, and my daughter is getting ready to go to Madagascar, I'm just doing the same ol' thing.

Road to the Amish

The Amish are fascinating people; so talented and resourceful. Today we headed to Etheridge to find some homegrown vegetables. We ended up with lots of corn, tomatoes and red potatoes, oh and don’t forget the watermelon for $2—not bad. Okay—just found a fresh loaf of bread—still warm—yum! Yes, I had to break off a piece for a taste. And cinnamon rolls with pecan topping. Yeah, I tried that too. (they were a little on the stale side) We didn’t see any buggies on the road until we were ready to leave the area. We saw some young boys coming in with a load of watermelons on their horse drawn cart and a man plowing his fields with a horse drawn plow. There were lots of children around and a cute little baby girl sitting in the middle of a pile of watermelons content with patting them with her tiny hands while her sister watched over her while swinging on the tree swing. I found an “Indian bead” necklace which looked like some type of seeds. I asked what they were made from and the lady just said, “A plant.” Okay. Said I could go look out back if I wanted. I guess I should have. Jim thought it was poisoned—I hope not. The lady said one customer called them “Indian teardrops”. They do look a little like teardrops. I also picked up a hand woven basket. It has the name of the person who made it on the bottom. It happened to be the name of another farm that we stopped at. I’m always surprised that they also grow tobacco on some of the farms. There wasn’t as much as in the past, but a large field. I love seeing the little schoolhouses which aren’t very big. I wonder how many children fit inside. I also wonder if they have their own curriculum to follow. Tuesday must be wash day since there were many lines filled with clean white shirts and blue pants and skirts. If I ever have any questions—I just ask mom. She’s read so many of the Amish fiction books that she knows a lot. At least I suppose most parts are true. I’d rather believe her than the Amish reality shows. I don’t understand why they do those shows. Seems it would disgrace them. Hmmm. For dinner we tried out the corn, squash and tomatoes. Well, not too happy with the corn. Was expecting it to be delicious and sweet. This batch wasn’t and Jim bought 41 ears. He scraped the corn off all the cobs and froze it. We’ll try it again off the cob. We will return! Mom does enjoy driving through the countryside and seeing all the Amish.

Fulfilled

What does that mean—fulfilled? Am I fulfilled? Remember those 5 books I said I was reading? Well, I finished with Fullfilled by Joey Lankford. (The refreshing alternative to the half-empty life.) Fulfilled won out for the book I’d finish first—about a local Tennessee family that gave up a great job and most of their material possessions to follow the call of God on their lives to South Africa, working with Living Way. The interest level kept me reading straight through and I enjoyed it, was inspired by it and I confess I’m envious of them. “Surrender!!” The big nine letter word. Fear has struck at this point. Can I actually pray: “God, anything. You have me.” Joey did. He surrendered everything to the Lord. That’s a hard thing for some of us to do. (or maybe just me) God wants our heart, our loyalty, and our trust. And we need to be ready for what he has for us. “There will come a time in your life when you’re going to need to be prepared. And you’re not going to have time to get prepared.” Pastor Mike Glen I’m a dreamer—God’s a dreamer too. God built us to dream. dream (n.) A strongly desired goal or purpose Something that fully satisfies a wish A visionary creation of the imagination Am I afraid God’s dream won’t coincide with mine? His ways are higher than our ways so maybe his dreams are bigger than ours. (I may have mentioned some of this in a previous blog.) So, what are my dreams? my visions? my passions? my purpose? Jennie Allen uses the following formula in her book Relentless: God’s Story + my threads + the need + the Holy Spirit=my purpose gifts talents passions dreams To go a little deeper: The story of God through Scripture + an understanding of myself and my resources + taking inventory of the need around me + the mystery of following the Holy Spirit’s leading=obediently living our purposes. “Build a working understanding of the ways you have been created, the stories that have been given to you, the passions in your soul, the people in your path, the places you are to be, and the purposes the Holy Spirit is calling you toward.” A couple of years ago, I believe I was given a vision of what I was supposed to do. How do I live it out though? I have ideas, some of which have kind of fallen into place. I’m just not sure how to get started. I am hoping to get involved in something similar, locally for now. I’ll keep you posted in how it all plays out.

Restless

I’m in the beginning stages of 5 books again. I can’t seem to get going on just one or two—but 5??? It’s all about interest level I guess. At this moment, I’m reading Restless: because you were made for more by Jennie Allen. Yes, I’ve been rather restless for the past several years. Pretty much since we’ve been in Tennessee. I had all these plans to get involved with this cause or that one but didn’t get too far. Unmotivated, lazy, dragging my feet, forgetful? Excuses every one of them and I’ve fallen into all of those at one time or another. So here I sit—RESTLESS! Fear has struck at this point. Can I actually pray “God, anything. You have me.”? I sometimes wonder. I’m a dreamer—and God’s a dreamer too. God built us to dream. dream (n.) A strongly desired goal or purpose something that fully satisfies a wish a visionary creation of the imagination Am I afraid God’s dream won’t coincide with mine? When my dreams don’t come true, I tend to give up. I’ve done that more than once: given up. However, I should never stop searching for purpose until God’s will becomes my passion. Am I afraid? Is there some deep need within me that keeps me from missing God’s plans for me? Maybe I should quit analyzing so much: “Quit analyzing everything and just do something.” -Kevin DeYoung “Just Do Something!” Yes, maybe that’s a good idea. Just do something. Stop just thinking about it and follow through. “So God, what am I supposed to do?” How about respond to the need you see right now. John Piper said-“Know Scripture, know yourself, and know the need around you.” We’re all different yet we’re one body. We each have a gift and we’re given the manifestation of the Spirit for the common good. And are my motives pure? Is my heart right before God? Is this where surrender comes in to play? The parable that Allen uses of running the race hit home with my kids and I. We’ve all been hurt by people; by the church. And as we sit there by the side of the road, we see others racing by. No one stops to offer help when we’re hurting. Why were we hurt? What happened? This is the church. Aren’t they supposed to stop and check on us? People are too busy with their own race it seems to stop and ask if we’re hurt or need help. For that matter, have I taken the time to stop for those on the side of the road? There is a time for every purpose under heaven. What time is it for me? What season am I in? What part of the race am I on? Will I finish well? Will I finish at all? Or will I stay by the side of the road. I’m thirsty. I’ve been waiting for someone to show me the way back into the race. I’ve been hurting and I’m longing for more. I’m not satisfied but not sure what to do about it. I’m asking, “Is there more? And if there is, how do I find it?” (paraphrase from the book) God has been speaking—but I haven’t always been quiet. I try to listen but I’m not sure what to do with all he is saying, what he’s asking of me. Paul says in Ephesians 4:1 “I urge you to live a life worthy of the calling you have received.” I need to run towards Hebrews 12:1-3: Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles, and let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us. Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy set before him endured the cross scorning its shame and sat down on the right hand of the throne of God. Consider him who endured such opposition from sinful men, so that you will not grow weary and lose heart.

I don't live the life of an adventurous world traveling missionary, though I'd like to. And I don't live the life of a wilderness naturalist, though I'd love to. But I live the life of a wife, mother, sister, daughter, niece and caregiver. I know we're to do the best we can, no matter what we are doing. But I sometimes want to do more. Then there are times I just want to sit in my room and be alone. I'd never be a motivational speaker without a little motivation, and that's what I think I lack. I can come up with ideas and reasons but the follow through isn't always there. I have gotten to do a lot of different things in my life. And most of them I've enjoyed. I've set goals, and accomplished some of those. But, still, there are other things I've thought about doing, but either didn't have the nerve or the "gumption" to get it done. I took up a challenge, well really I tweaked it a bit, but I haven't even worked on that all that much. I have a habit of reading several books at once, if I find some that catch my interest. I was in the middle of like 5 books and I was determined finish them all. Well, I got 2 finished, but then I added a couple. So now, I'm in the middle of 6. One also includes a study guide. So I filled out a calendar with the books I'll read each day but I'm still behind. Now I can't even find the calendar. Sometimes I just can't focus and sometimes I'm just not in the mood to read. However, I will eventually get them read, one way or the other. And did I mention, I hardly read a book from front to back. Does that tell you anything? Here it is the second week of December and I still haven't finished my next book. I'm now reading a children's book: My Side of the Mountain. A good read.

I haven't been keeping up with blogging, at least on this blog. It was over a year before I blogged last night about my husband's surgery. I've often thought about it though. I do have a nature blog that I use to keep track of my Kamana journaling. September was the last blog posted there. I haven't been out journaling because of the invasion of progress to my neighborhood. I believe I will post a bit of my last evaluation though. This week has been up and down with emotions. And Jim has been up and down with how he's been feeling. Some days are good and he's sitting up watching TV or a movie. Other times he's feeling slow and in bed. I did call the doctor again to find out if any of his symptoms have been unusual but I guess not. He still has another week before going in to see the surgeon. I'm not sure what's going to happen. Taking it one day at a time. I have a hard time with caregiving. With kids, it's a piece of cake. But with adults, it gets a bit harder. I did help with Jim's mom and dads a few years ago when they were going through diabetes and heart failure before passing into heaven. That was a difficult time. Oh, it wasn't both at the same time, a couple of years apart. And I've had mom living with us for a while now making sure she's comfortable, taking her to the doctors and to JoAnne's for her yarn. However, she's now living with Melanie again, for a while at least. Now with Jim, a little different still. I'm praying for a quick recovery, but still no idea what the future holds for him. Whether he'll return to work or completely retire this time. I can't really see him doing that though, since he loves being around people so much and I'm just pretty boring. Ha! We'll find out more after his doctor's visits. In the meantime, I'm trying to relearn to cook, in a more healthy manner. It's not easy since I haven't cook much in years. With Jim's schedule so varied, we eat on the fly a lot of times. I'm afraid I'm in need of help. I had fun with the boys this week. Friday we went shopping for Operation Christmas Child to fill our shoe boxes for a child someplace in this world who may not get Christmas otherwise. We tried watching the new Veggie Tales Christmas movie but the boys weren't very interested. But we still had fun. Till next time...

The Heart of the Matter

I’ve taken on a challenge--that’s right--to blog once a week this month. From whom you may ask? From a friend at lovewritecreate.com. Check these 3 authors out if you are currently writing or if you’re an aspiring author. I haven’t blogged in some time and I have been thinking about it this week. So here I am. On Halloween, my husband Jim, had an appointment for an angioplasty. He had been having some symptoms which he thought were bronchial/respiratory. After seeing his doctor, he was referred to a heart specialist and a few days later this test. We got to the hospital around 7 a.m. for the 9 a.m. procedure. They were running late but I just hung out in Jim’s room. I received a text from a friend out in the waiting room and went out to talk. MJ is a nurse and she just felt she needed to be there with me. And was she ever right. A while later, the nurse came to get me, however, not just me. She insisted that my friend come along. I knew things must be serious. After talking with the doctor, I was informed that Jim had 2 arteries that were blocked at 99% and that he’d need a triple bypass surgery. Well, I sure wasn’t expecting that. I saw pictures of the blockage and was told that the catheter couldn’t even enter into the blocked area--they had to shoot die into it to see further. I was later informed that this blockage was called the “widowmaker” because it often times ends in a major heart attack and even death. The doctor was surprised that he hadn’t had a heart attack or even any heart damage. Jim had been having these symptoms for 2-3 months. Needless to say, Jim wasn’t leaving the hospital that night. Later that afternoon, my kids arrived to stay with me awhile. I decided to go home that night to get some sleep. I felt Jim was in good hands. The next morning, bright and early, my sister and I headed for the hospital again to hopefully catch Jim before he went in for surgery. We made it. We got to see him a few minutes before they began anesthesia. We went in once more, right before being wheeled to the OR and he randomly asked: “Did Ben get a job?” Then began the waiting game. It took about three and a half hours for the surgery and the staff was good about informing us of the progress about every ninety minutes. We sat, we talked, we snacked, and we walked, waiting for the outcome. Around 11:30, surgery was over and we could speak with the doctor. All went well and we peeked in on Jim who was hooked up to so many machines and IV’s it was a bit scary. We had to leave him for a few hours and returned after they had removed his breathing tube. It ended up being a quadruple bypass. We were extremely pleased with the hospital, the doctors, nurses and staff. They were wonderful. And so happy that Jim finally listened to his friends and got checked out. He’s home now recuperating but is missing work and his coworkers.

It's been a while since I've posted on this blog. However, I have written up a few stories on my naturalist blog. I've been taking the 2nd session of an extension class, so I've added some of my adventures in the field, how I feel about them, and what I've seen or heard. In some I have shared about my "sit spot", a place close to home that can be visited on a daily basis if I want to and then "spots" that are a little further away. I got a little bored with my "sit spot" at times because I'd never see anything new. However, the more I came the more I became familiar with the birds that I did see. I saw the beauty in even the weeds. I learned to identify some new species of birds and wildflowers as well as clouds. I think perhaps that was the most interesting for me this past month--the shapes of clouds, learning to identify them and to find animals and objects found within the clouds. Of course, we've had some intense summer storms which have bee exciting to see. One just the other night. The sky continued to light up over and over even though I couldn't always hear any thunder. Glad we didn't lose the BBQ grill. Only the fire pit was swept across the street. As far as visitors this past year, my sister came for a visit, as well as her daughter. They came at different times so we got to spread out our visiting the sites and eateries of Nashville. Later my niece and her daughter came to visit from CA and we did it all over again. In May I took a trip to Oregon to visit my son whom I hadn't seen in 5 years. It was great to see him and his girlfriend along with their dog, Mr. Bottoms. I got to see a lot of Portland and their motto, keep it strange, is true to the city. It was interesting to say the least. I stayed with my sister and then got to visit some great places, especially the eateries. I love eating out. I got to visit a couple of churches in the area and a pancake place with a griddle in the middle of our table. We got to make our own pancakes. How fun was that. A Chinese restaurant, unlike my usual Chinese food (Panda, lol). Visited the big open market down by the river and saw all kinds of interesting people and things, including a guy on a bike with a piano on the front of it pedaling around playing and singing. Had some delicious Mexican food, pizza and cajun sub. My niece took me to the zoo which was a lot of fun. I hadn't been in years so didn't really remember much. After Portland I headed to Colorado to meet my godson for the very first time. He is terrific. I had a great time with all 6 kids and tried to help out as they were in the middle of packing up for a cross country move. I got home a couple of weeks later and though it was good to be home, I must say it was a great vacation. Next? A trip to CA. Can't wait. Will try to post when I get back.

Week 3 of Lent

I ended up slacking off last weeks challenge. I had attempted eating just 7 foods but that just didn’t work for me. Because I’m lazy? Selfish? Not sure if I have an answer for that. Just plain didn’t want to I suppose. I like to eat. And I like to go out to eat.
So, this week’s challenge is to change the way I spend my time, eat, dress, etc. to reflect my passions. So I decided I’d do the “7” challenge for dress by wearing only 7 different pieces of clothing this week. My choices for this week will be: jeans, gray shoes, p.j. bottoms, Africa t-shirt, gray striped longsleeve shirt, lightweight blue jacket, and Mickey longsleeve shirt. Underclothes are considered free. I don’t want to remove my pierced jewelry in case the holes close up--is that cheating?
How does this relate to my passions? Well, I’m passionate about the poor and needy. Though I realize many people in developing nations don’t even have 7 pieces of clothing to their name, I’m going to try doing without a lot. I’ve been trying to rid my life of “things” and live more simply but it’s not always easy in a society like ours that more means a better life or happier, etc. I’m not one to buy a new wardrobe every season. I own 1 pair of pants and 2 pairs of shoes (besides my slippers). Well, no, 3 counting my hiking boots. I can’t really imagine what it is like to wear rags and only 2 sets for that matter. What clothes do I have that I truly need and which ones do I have just because.
Now, my eating for the week. I decided to forgo something different each day. Many people around the world don’t have the luxury of going to the grocery store each time they are out of something. For that matter, they don’t have the money to buy something extra. The other day I wanted something sweet, since I was giving up chocolate. So I bought my Red Vines and Hot Tamales. Do people really get the chance to do that in a 3rd world country? Any time they please? So for Monday I decided to just eat fruit. I started the morning off with a fruit smoothie. I made it that far. Can I go the entire day? Hope so. I made it.
Day 2 I gave up sweets--candy, cookies, cake, etc. But was that really fair since I don’t always have those things anyway? Well, day 2 ended my week for changing my eating.
But, it’s Sunday and I went the whole week using just 7 articles of clothing. However, I did wash some of them once during the week. Most people in the poorer nations would have done them by hand, I had the luxury of a washer and dryer.
So did any of this matter or do any good? Well, for me, it was a prompt--a reminder--to pray for those in need.

Lent and Sacrifice Revisited

I did spend a little time trying to decide what I could/should give up during Lent. I felt chocolate was a good thing to let go of for at least 40 days. I was doing okay but yesterday I was having some cravings, or withdrawals. I did mess up when Carey made a little individual chocolate cake and wanted me to taste it. I wasn't even thinking and took a bite (my confession) though it was probably 1/4 teaspoon.
Another thing I challenged myself with was the "7" challenges in Jen Hatmaker's book. The topics I mentioned in my "Lent" blog. Instead of spending a month on each goal, I'd spend a week. So last week was giving away 7 things each day for 7 days. How did I do? Don't ask! I did bag up several items but I haven't got the other things ready. Plus, I'm trying to find a local group that can use them. This week's topic is food. I chose 7 foods and that's all I can eat. The foods I chose are: peanut butter, whole wheat bread, oatmeal, carrots, apples, flour tortillas and beans and water is free. How did I do on day one? Well, the oatmeal pretty much made me gag. Since I couldn't use any type of sweetener, I shredded up some apples to mix in. Ummm, it didn't really help. Then for lunch, I had a bean burrito but cheated by having a little cheese on it. (I really didn't need to do that.) Then tonight I had 2 pieces of toast with peanut butter. Another confession, Jim brought me a Vitamin Water and without thinking I took a drink. Okay, so today didn't go so well.
The challenge from Relentless Act:s of Sacrifice was to sacrifice our living (or work) space to remind us of what is important, what we're passionate about, reminders. So I've done that with my sitting/classroom. I've put up pictures of street children in Africa, pictures and posters of verses for the poor, how Jesus wants us to fast, the hungry, lack of clean water, malaria, etc.
This second week of sacrifice is about the food we eat. So many countries live on less than $2 a day. They can barely feed their families. As political crisis continue, food prices escalate. (As in Madagascar.) Change the way you eat and the information you consume. Kind of goes along with the "7" challenge for this week.
I hope that you are drawing close to the Lord during these days before we celebrate the resurrection of our Savior.
I will keep you posted on my challenges. I think I can do more.

Celebrate! Celebrate!

This past weekend, I invited (read: forced) my family to pack up the car and head to the mountains of Northern Georgia to celebrate my 5 year anniversary, free of breast cancer. The first two anniversaries were kind of a big deal to everyone, however, as the years rolled along, it became less of one. However, for all of you cancer survivors out there, every year that date rolls around is special. Anyway, we drove 5 hours to Amicalola Falls again, one of my favorite spots. Some of us had been before but this was Carey’s first time to join us.
February 27 marks 5 years since being diagnosed with Stage 1 breast cancer. So I thought it would be fun to celebrate with the family and do something special. We decided to pack up the car and head down to Georgia. Carey had never been with us in the past so it was a new adventure for her. We headed out for Amicalola Falls. It took us about 4-1/2 hours (with a couple of stops) and we decided to stop in Dohlonega to eat lunch and walk around the town square. We ate at Chik-fil-a, a safe place to eat I thought, but I ended up getting sick. We did make it to a few shops but I was out of it for a while. We got to the park around 6 and checked in to our cabin. (BTW we’re driving on 1/4 tank of gas, actually a little less, and the nearest gas station is 18 miles away. We’ll see if we make it back to town.)
Our cabin is quite roomy--2 bedrooms with 3 double beds, bathroom, full kitchen, living and dining room. It sits in front of the creek. The family honored me with gifts--Season 1 of “Father Dowling”, Barnes & Noble gift card, Olivia stuffed pig and a Shutterfly book of E and J-Bear. (Yes, I cried.)
We played games, watched some “Monk” and had lots of fun.
Jim and Charley got up early to go to the lodge for a breakfast buffet. Expecting to pay $7 each, the waitress didn’t charge them. SCORE! Free bacon. lol The rest of us should have gone.
It’s really cold outside but we plan to take a hike then head to Helen, a little German town after stopping off at the Cabbage Patch Babyland Hospital in Cleveland. Remember those dolls? Did you have one too?
We took a short walk up to the Nature Center--the docents had a Barred Owl and a Screech Owl out. Before that was a Great Horned Owl and another small one. The corn snake was a favorite with the children there. We headed up to the Reflection pond but Jim wasn’t feeling well so bowed out. The girls and I continued our walk up. Carey wants to try climbing the 604 steps to the top of the falls tomorrow. No one wants to join her so we’ll drive to the top. (Read: cheaters)
After our walk we drove over to Helen, the little German town I mentioned. On the way we saw the Cabbage Patch Hospital so went in to visit the babies. We got there just in time to witness a birth. We saw it right after being removed from the cabbage. The nurse then took the baby to the nursery to weigh and measure. The were a lot of children and they loved it. All around the room were displays of dolls and several with their heads poking out of the cabbages in the cabbage patch. They had adoption waiting rooms and a huge gift shop.
We then headed to Helen, walked around town and stopped in to share a funnel cake. We had dinner at Johnny B’s and now back at the cabin relaxing. Hope it warms up tomorrow.
Still cold but took a little walk to the falls. Carey climbed the 604 steps to the top of the falls. We met her at the top. Then left for home. Had a great time this weekend.

Sacrifice

Sac-ri-fice: an act of offering to a deity something precious, to offer as a sacrifice. (Webster’s)
The Ultimate Sacrifice: Jesus’ death on the cross.
What sacrifice means to me: giving of oneself til it hurts. Not when you have lots of time and you decide to use it to feed the homeless. Not when you have wealth and you give it to charities. It’s when you have a little, and you’re willing to give that.
I don’t believe that I’ve sacrificed to the point that it really hurts. That’s why I’ve chosen to share about someone else, my daughter. To me, she sacrificed til it hurt. Cory sacrificed the comforts of the Western world to spend nine years in a third world country because she heard the heart and call of God.
Though living on less than a missionary’s budget, she may have still lived better than most nationals. She gave up much to serve the people of Madagascar.
She sacrificed her health--getting malaria more than once and respiratory problems caused from polluted air. So much so she was hospitalized and at one point thought she wasn’t going to make it.
She sacrificed being with family for those years--missing birthdays (hers and ours), Christmas and all of the other holidays and just day to day life.
She wasn’t here when her grandparents passed into Heaven or when I was diagnosed with breast cancer.
She gave up many modern conveniences like a washer and dryer--she learned to wash her clothes by hand. Also, modern toilets--ever tried a “squatty potty”? 101? She did have some modern conveniences, depending on where she lived. But if you want hot water, you heat it on the stove, if you have one or if not, coals.
So why would she sacrifice so much? To be in the center of God’s will. What better place to be.
Though she sacrificed much, she had some remarkable experiences living in another culture and being a light to the island. She spent time learning the language and the culture of the Malagasy by living with them. She shared the love of Jesus Christ with the children. She prayed with the sick in the hospital and brought joy into the lives of orphans. She made some special friends and also faced some heartaches, but she does want to return some day.


The Children




Places To Go





Health

Lent

Lent: the 40 weekdays from Ash Wednesday to Easter observed by the Roman Catholic, Eastern and some Protestant churches as a period of penitence and fasting. (a period of fasting and regret for one's sins that is observed on the 40 weekdays from Ash Wednesday to Easter by many churches) (Webster's online dictionary)

I've never fully participated in Lent. I may have given up something at one time or another for Lent, however, I really don't remember if it had much meaning for me.
Last year I half-heartedly took part in World Visions Act:s ReLentless Acts of Justice--mainly sharing the stories sent to me on Facebook. I do feel fairly strongly about injustice issues and I want others to be aware. Not everyone lives in a world of rainbows and lollipops. There is much suffering around the world as well as in our own country. If I can bring awareness to just one person, it's worth taking a little time to advocate. Of course this gave me a focused time of prayer for these issues, but was it really considered Lent for me?
So, what am I going to sacrifice for Lent this year? Well, I told myself yesterday morning I would give up chocolate and XXX Vitamin Water--both items I feel I am addicted to. So what did I do at Target? I walked down the Valentine's clearance aisle and found chocolate kisses (my all time favorites) for 70% off. Score! They were small boxes with 6 kisses each at only 10c a box. What a bargain! And what goes better with candy than a bottle of vitamin water? Well, that idea went over like a lead balloon. So what will I do with 1/2 bottle of XXX now and 4 candy kisses?
Another idea came as I read a new book: 7: AN EXPERIMENTAL MUTINY AGAINST EXCESS, written by Jen Hatmaker. Along the lines of David Platt's RADICAL, Jen decides to spend 7 months ridding her life of material possessions, using less, or giving up a few things. She would spend one month on each of the 7 topics: clothes, shopping, waste, food, possessions, media and stress. So I thought I'd try the same challenge for 7 weeks (a little longer than Lent but that's okay). The only trouble, I'm not quite ready, I want to read a little more.
In the meantime, this years W.V. Act:s challenge is ReLentless Sacrifice which actually fits nicely with the "7" challenge.
I'll let you know how it goes.

Isaiah 58 (read the entire chapter if you have a few minutes)
vs. 5-10 "Is this the kind of fast I have chosen, only a day for a man to humble himself? Is it only for bowing one's head like a reed and for lying on sackcloth and ashes? Is that what you call a fast, a day acceptable to the Lord?
"Is not this the kind of fasting I have chosen: to loose the chains of injustice and untie the cords of the yoke, to set the oppressed free and break every yoke?
"Is it not to share your food with the hungry and to provide the poor wanderer with shelter--when you see the naked, to clothe him, and not to turn away from your own flesh and blood?
"Then your light will break forth like the dawn, and your healing will quickly appear; then your righteousness will go before you, and the glory of the Lord will be your rear guard.
"Then you will call, and the Lord will answer; you will cry for help, and he will say: Here am I.
"If you do away with the yoke of oppression, with the pointing finger and malicious talk,
and if you spend yourselves in behalf of the hungry and satisfy the needs of the oppressed, then your light will rise in the darkness, and your night will become like the noonday.

Human Trafficking Awareness Month

January has been Human Trafficking Awareness Month. Though January is coming to an end, the reality of human trafficking has not. In Nashville, 28 Somalians are now going to trial for the role they’ve played in child sex trafficking--transporting pre-teens and teens between three states and forcing them to engage in commercial sex acts.
In Dallas/Fort Worth area, the trafficker of a 13 year old girl is going to trial. “This little girl has been sentenced to a lifetime of horrific memories.” (Traffick911). World Vision has advocated for the passage of the Trafficking Victims Protection Reauthorization Act to protect enslaved and exploited children around the world. Unfortunately, politics (US) is playing a part in preventing this Act to go through. I have posted some of these articles if you’re interested in reading more. And don’t get me started on “Superbowl Sunday” when hundreds of young girls and women will be bought and sold for the pleasure of men before, during, and after the game. If you can do nothing else, please PRAY for these children, many who have been forced, threatened, and abducted into these situations. West VA is one of 2 states with no law against human trafficking.

Surgery

January 9
The fun has begun. Woke up about 6 a.m. to get ready for outpatient surgery--a DNC and removal of a polyp. I never look forward to being “put under” but it is recommended for this procedure.
We ran in to a bit of traffic but made it just 10 minutes late. Well, now the waiting begins. The Women’s Center didn’t send over my orders and there’s no bed available for me. It’s 7:30
I’m nervous as it is and these delays don’t make me feel any better. But on the up side--the bathrooms have toilet seat covers. HA! (something you don’t normally see in the south)
Cory’s been praying Psalm 91 for me, a chapter we’ve prayed for each other over the years. Vs. 1 He who dwells in the shelter of the most high will rest in the shadow of the Almighty. ...He is my refuge and my fortress, my God in whom I trust.”
And another verse that was part of yesterdays sermon--Psalm 55:22 Cast your cares on the Lord and He will sustain you, he will never let the righteous fall, 23b But as for me, I trust in You.
8:18 still waiting
This is the year of writing letters to doctors/clinics here. Last week I had to write mom’s doctor because of a rude nurse. I heard right back from someone in the office, then the next day from the director of nurses of Williamson Co. Vanderbilt clinics. She wasn’t happy and was going to take action.
Next I wrote to Cool Springs Imaging (a bit late) because of the scare they gave me last year after my mammogram--saying it was abnormal then saying it wasn’t. The tech pushed the wrong button and therefore sent the wrong letter. Jim talked with 3 other people that weekend, as I waited to get that straightened out, that had similar experiences there. You don’t make a mistake like that for anyone but particularly a breast cancer survivor. Plus, I had another exam a couple of year prior that gave me a wrong diagnosis. So, I will no longer go to that clinic.
8:30--1-1/2 hrs. later--finally checking in. Thing is, my doctor knew I wasn’t a morning person, ha. Well, less time in the room, unless the surgery is moved back.
8:43--finally in my room. No coat hooks and the closet has no hangers. Hook in the bathroom for clothes though. Dressed in good and non-skid sox and layed in bed.
First person in--a young man to do an EKG and one to draw blood. Strange he had a scanner to check my wristband against his info. Then of course the nurses began coming in.
I was wheeled back to surgery at I’m not sure what time--no clocks on the walls. After a short wait the anesthesiologist stopped by and then the surgeon. I was knocked out and taken to surgery at 10:15. I had no idea about anything until I was back in my room at noon. I dozed off and on, the ceiling was moving and the trees outside--and not from the wind. The nurses were in and out every hour and I was able to leave at 3.
The hospital experience wasn’t as bad as I thought it might be. I was happy with the staff and the doctor. I rested the remainder of the day.
Thursday--just heard from the doctor--the polyp was benign.
I appreciate all the prayers sent up for me. God is good.

Waiting.....

Over the past week I’ve been in and out of the doctors. It started with my annual checkup and I’m ending the week with a uterine biopsy. What’s going on? Well, for the past 4-1/2 years I’ve been on three different medicines for my breast cancer. This last medicine, however, has caused some problems that would be from Tamoxifen. From the beginning, doctors wanted me to go on this particular medicine but I was afraid of blood clots (a side effect). The first 2 meds that I was on caused pain and swelling in my ankles and hands; I wanted some relief from that. So about a year or so ago, I decided to give Tamoxifen a try. Well, was it worth it? I’ll never really know, though my hands and feet are better. Not only does Tamoxifen cause blood clots, it also causes uterine cancer (I’m trying to eliminate cancer). So, here I am getting ultrasounds and now a biopsy. They think it’s probably just a thickened lining but there was a 3cm mass. And now comes the waiting.....
Is cancer on my mind? Yeah, sure it is. Am I trying not to go there? Yeah, I am trying. I realize there is always a chance of the cancer monster attacking. But I try not to let it get the better of me. All this to say--I’ve been re-evaluating my life. Why do things like this start us thinking?

Since I was diagnosed with cancer, I’ve done some soul searching. Not as much or as diligently as I should have I suppose, but nonetheless. I guess you could say I’m in the winter of my life, or at least the late fall and I’m wanting to finish well. A video posted on my Facebook today once again reminded me that we should be about our Father’s business. Clayton (the boy in the video) did just that. He lived out John 3:16 during his short life of 18 years. He still blesses us, teaches us, and reminds us that God is the answer. So how am I going to finish? Will it be the way I have been for the past few years, doing pretty much nothing? Or will I be about MY Father’s business?

A Heart for Africa

(Written a while back.)
For the past few days I have been watching videos and looking through pictures of African children. Children in the Kibera slums o Nairobi, Kenya having AWANA. Amazing the number of children that come to hear the word of God and play AWANA games. Then there are pictures of children in Tanzania and Ugand.
I’be been asked to pray for the children of Tanzania as well as all of Africa. It’s awesome to see God working throughout the continent.
Why is my heart being gripped by the children of Africa? What is it about these ids that has such a strong pull?
I think the first country I felt drawn to was Sudan. It was when I heard someone from Voice of the Martyrs speak on the persecuted church in that country. I’ve never had a particular country that I felt I was solely interested in.
When working with AWANA, we adopted a club in Zimbabwe. We corresponded with the AWANA missionary over the years and talked over the phone when he was in the states. We finally got to meet him this year when he stayed with us for a week. He is now Director of AWANA for the entire continent of Africa. (I blogged his visit several months ago.)

California Dreamin'

I’ve spent the past 3 weeks in CA and I must say I have enjoyed my time. The first 2 weeks were spent at the beach, the pier, Disneyland and with nieces and nephews. This past week I have been catching up with old friends in my hometown of Atascadero and Paso Robles. It has been such a blessing. I have been inspired by a few of them.
I have one friend who just amazes me. She’s battling breast cancer again and going through chemo. However, did that keep her from doing what she loves? No, not at all. She waited by the phone to see if her white blood cells had gone up at all so she could have her treatment the following day. They had and she bounced up to head for Morro Bay so she could paddle with the dragon boat ladies. 22 on the boat, all but a couple survivors of cancer. How exciting that was to watch. The team competes with other dragon boaters around the state. The following morning, before her chemo, she went to 2 exercise classes and the next morning climbed Cerro Alto before coming to say goodbye at the park. She’s such an inspiration. I think I’ll try a little harder to take a longer walk.
Next I visited S. She has been extremely busy caring for her mother, but she took the time to serve lunch. We had a wonderful time catching up and she always has a little encouraging word or food for thought. I think I’ll try a little harder to eat healthier.
I’ve struggled the past few years about what I should be doing with the rest of my life. I have been trying to figure it all out. P has an independent study program set me on the path to doing a little research and putting together some ideas for field trips and science. I think I’ll try a little harder to work on some plans.
These last 2 days I have spent with a dear friend whom I hadn’t seen in 3 years. We did some catching up, shed a few tears, went to the beach twice and took a walk through the manzanita forest on their property. The kids were amazing--a 3 year old telling me about Toyon berries and a little girl that can make a shelter. I think I’ll try a little harder to teach my little guy a more about nature and to take better care of the environment.
I also met a few more at the park. It was nice they could stop by. I got to hear some terrific kids recite their Bible verses they had memorized. Not just 1 verse, but an entire passage. Nice job C family. I think I’ll try a little harder to memorize a Scripture myself.
Thanks for all the inspiration friends. I hope I can stick with it.

Leavin' On A Jet Plane...eventually!

Well, here’s how my day’s been. Got up early to talk to oncologist about the letter I received Saturday from imaging saying my mammogram was abnormal and I needed followup after I was told everything was fine. (is that a run-on sentence) I was reassured there must have been a mistake. They had me fax the letter to investigate. In the mean time, I called the imaging place again and she was all apologetic saying she didn’t know how she could have made such a mistake she was so sorry. I didn’t make a big stink but I’m thinking, this was the 2nd time for me and talking to 3 other people this weekend who’ve had problems, it makes me think they need to do something about it. And of course, I’m freaking out all this time wondering “What if...” Yes, I know what I should have been doing, but still....
Then, there was the problem with my bank. The other night, Cory and I were ordering our Disneyland tickets. The site wouldn’t allow me to purchase them together so after ordering mine, we went back to order hers. For some reason it wouldn’t work, over and over again. So, she used a different account. I then received an email saying they had blocked my account because of unusual activity. They wanted to make sure it was me making purchases. I’m not sure why they couldn’t call me to ask. And of course, this happened over the weekend so had to work it out this morning. That got straightened out.
Then, I had to get temporary insurance cards in case I drive while in California. We never received our new ones. The others expired in May.
To top it all off, we get to the airport only to find our flight delayed. Well, we had an inkling when we looked up our flight status online before leaving. We were to leave at 5:35 pm and were told to be on time in case the delay was adjusted. We went through security early and I had a voice message on my phone from the airline saying we wouldn’t be leaving until 7:10. That’s fine, but that would give us little time to connect in Las Vegas. So, we talk to the attendant and the flight in Vegas would be delayed also so shouldn’t be a problem. I hope not. I really don’t want to spend the night in the Las Vegas airport. Our plane is delayed due to bad weather conditions in Florida. Don’t you think a meal voucher would be nice?
So, here I sit, starting my vacation blog earlier than intended. But no problem, I’ve been wanting something to write about.
Let’s see, what’s going on in the Nashville airport? Oh, watch your step, you might trip over one of those names dropping on the floor. And then I had to move because of the smell of collard greens and mac and cheese across from me. There is live music close by at Tootsies Orchid Lounge. You can also find a Tootsie’s on Broadway, downtown.
Okay, so we finally got to board our plane around 7:15. Cory and I didn’t have any trouble finding seats together, in fact we had an extra seat. Just hope we make it to our connecting flight on time. The flight has been okay. Only once, so far, was there some turbulence and they had to turn on the “buckle your seat belt” sign. We did get a snack and drink, though I opted not to drink my Sprite, after seeing the flight attendant smashing the ice with a can, I figured I could do without. Trying to keep my legs moving. There is plenty of leg room which is nice. The plane has 2 rows of 3 seats each.
This seems to be a long flight. Well, we arrive in Las Vegas and we’re told the next plane was waiting for us, along with several others that need to catch their flights to various places. I was told that the Vegas airport was small, so I’m thinking maybe a little bigger than San Luis. How wrong I was! I think we walked a mile from one concourse to the other. As we were trying to rush, the pilot was there telling us not to worry, they were waiting for us. Besides, there were others that got there after we did. Though quite a bit of turbulence, the flight seemed like 10 minutes rather than 45. We arrived safely, Bennett and Rachel met us at baggage and all of our bags arrived as well.
We talked awhile then I finally went to bed, it was 3:15 a.m. by then, TN time.

California or Bust!

I’m really looking forward to our trip to California. It has been 3 years too long since I was home. I know home is where the heart is or where the family is; my family is in Tennessee but my heart is still in California.
There have been some good times here in Tennessee. I’ve seen some interesting and amazing things like the Great Smokey Mountains--in the snow, going back in the fall for colors; the Natchez Trace, the Blue Ridge Mountains and Amicalola Falls in North Georgia. Seeing where the Amish live was another interesting place to visit. We enjoy the fresh vegetables in the summer.
I do enjoy the thunderstorms but the tornados are quite scary-especially the ones that hit in nearby states--taking out so many homes. When the sirens go off, it’s in to the closet we go.
We’ve also been able to reconnect with some of mom’s relatives. She’s from Mississippi and Dad was from Arkansas, where I lived in first and second grades. It was fun to see mom’s birthplace, Duck Hill, MS and we even drove through West Memphis, Arkansas where I lived. It wasn’t the same of course.
I think we’ve had more visitors here--my sister and niece came from Hawaii one Christmas, another niece and her two teens from CA and our friend from Alaska.
We got to attend the Dove Awards at the Grand Ole Opry and the after party. Saw Nickel Creek at the Ryman and Peter Andrews at Christmas. I so wish to see Emmylou Harris at the Ryman, and I’d love to see Reba and the Judd’s.
We’ve had some great times with friends Bethany and Shannon throughout the year and some holidays. And of course I’ve enjoyed having Elijah once a week for the past few years, watching him grow up.